Part III-Section IV

I have began to see the light at the end of the tunnel. My isolated cell is not as dark or lonely anymore. The guards are not as scary either. My body is feeling stronger now thanks to a regular meal schedule and small exercise. I could not stand how weak and insignificant I looked a month ago. Although my body is stronger, my mind still remains insane. No matter how hard nor how long I contemplate and absorb all that O' Brien has told me in our sessions, I can not wrap my finger around believing their lies. Deep down, I know what the Party says is made up, but is anything really true anymore. I can and will accept what they tell me, but I cannot make myself believe it. O' Brien says I have made progress, but further steps are required to make me a true Party member. Soon, I will finally find out what room 101 is. I do not care if they kill me, nor do I care if they let me go. All I hope is that O' Brien does what he needs to do to me quick. I would think of Julia more right now, but how can I? She betrayed me almost instantly...